writer, sex educator, witch
writer, sex educator, witch
I'm a seasoned sex educator and health promotion professional with a focus in reproductive justice and youth empowerment. With nearly a decade of experience in developing health education programming, working in erotic retail, and putting condoms on bananas, I don't just talk about sex—I know about it.
My mission is to support everyone—regardless of gender, orientation, libido, relationship style, kink/fetish, or sexual experience—in living their best and healthiest sexual lives. No question is too stupid, and no fantasy is too bizarre. All you have to do is ask.
In addition to my work as an educator, I have experience as a freelance writer, an editorial consultant, a sex shop employee, a workshop facilitator, a public speaker, a yoga instructor, and more. I'm a practicing witch and professional tarot reader currently living in New York City with my cat, Princess Walter.
All means all: no matter someone's age, sexual orientation, libido, gender identity, kink, fetish, fantasy, relationship structure, sexual experience, race/ethnicity, class, history of trauma, physical ability, genital configuration, mental/emotional health, or cultural attitudes towards sex, all people have a right to access the information they need to make decisions about their sexual health and pleasure, and to access this information in spaces that are safe, accessible, and comfortable.
Our sex lives are not separate from our "real" lives, and finding our happiest, healthiest sex lives is a crucial part of maintaining our overall well-being. Whether someone wants lots of kinky sex or no sex at all, being able to effectively identify and safely pursue our desires is a fundamental part of living an integrated life. Being in touch with our sexual selves can help us identify and avoid sexual coercion, take control of our reproductive health, and experience new heights of pleasure.
Much existing sexuality education is fear-based and pain-avoidant. We often teach reproductive health from the perspective of NOT getting STIs, and teach consent from the perspective of NOT violating consent/having one's consent violated. I believe that sexuality education should come first and foremost from the healthy pursuit of pleasure, whether that means talking about pleasurable safer sex practices, experiencing non-sexual pleasure and intimacy, pursuing pleasure post-gender transition, or the power of consent to facilitate pleasurable sexual exploration. Emotional health and self-love are a necessary foundation for healthy, pleasurable lives.
Ozy Magazine, "Spells for the Modern Day Sorceress"
Garden Collage, "Haylin Belay on Practicing Witchcraft in NYC"
Blue & White Magazine, "Campus Character: Haylin Belay"
Real Talk Radio, "Haylin Belay on Sex Education, Modern Witchcraft, and Relationship Anarchy"
Another Round, "Dearest Y'all, We Have Some News."
Sex. Right. Now., "Ladies of Sex Tech" [trailer]
Juicy Bits, "Sexpert Haylin Belay"
Flash Forward, "How Is Babby (Not) Made"
Biology of the Blog, "Haylin Belay"
The Daily Show, "Sexual Racism: When Preferences Become Discrimination"
Woodhull Sexual Freedom Summit 2018 [Panel] "Power, Pleasure, Profit: Radical Visions of Consent"
Black Girl Project Sisterhood Summit 2018 "The Sacrament of Yes: Creating a Positive Consent Culture"
Northwest Magic Conference 2018 [Keynote] "What Feels Right: Intuition & Pleasure In Magical Practice" / "Mind, Body, & Spirit: Bodywork for Healing Intuition"
Civil Liberties and Public Policy 2018 [Panel] "Power, Pleasure, Profit: Radical Visions of Consent"
National Sex Ed Conference 2017 "Creating, Maintaining, and Repairing Safe Spaces"
SisterSong 2017 [Plenary Panel] "Power, Pleasure, Profit: Radical Visions of Consent"
Columbia University Scholars Program Symposium 2014 "Alcohol use and risky sexual behavior among young adults living in Nantes, France"
BACCHUS Initiative General Assemblies 2012/2013/2014, Regional Assembly 2013/2014, IvyAlcohol Symposium 2014 "Responsible Communities @ Columbia: Peer Education Models for Alcohol Education"