haylin belay

is a trauma-informed health educator, sexuality expert, bodyworker, & pleasure witch

sex ed for all ; health education & consulting
somatic self-bodywork ; trauma-informed movement
whole-self witchcraft ; self-care for magical thinkers
social-emotional tarot ; readings & lessons

“all people deserve an integrated sex life
and the healthy pursuit of pleasure.”"

learn more

Hi! I'm Haylin.

I'm a trauma-responsive health educator, sexuality expert, bodyworker, and pleasure witch offering adult psychoeducation from an integrated mind-body-spirit perspective.

With over a decade of hands-on experience developing award-winning health education programming and providing professional development for clinicians, educators, and activists, I’ve dedicated my life to teaching people of all ages practical skills for healthier, more pleasurable lives.

My mission is to support everyone—regardless of background—in living their best and healthiest lives. All you have to do is ask.

In addition to my work as a health promotion professional, I have experience as a writer, a workshop facilitator, a public speaker, a yoga instructor,  an independent podcaster, and more. I'm a practicing witch and professional Tarot reader currently living in Baltimore with my cat, Princess Walter.

Principles of Practice

I am a psychoeducation provider with expertise in queer-inclusive comprehensive sexual health education and social-emotional development for youth and adults. I am trained in (and train others in) trauma-informed practice in educational, organizational, and clinical settings. My approach is based in the biopsychosocial model of wellness, applying frameworks of intersectionality and neurodiversity, among others. Additionally, I use secular witchcraft as a prevention and intervention tool for addressing the spiritual impact of trauma and promoting psychosocial wellness. My work reflects my personal beliefs as a relationship anarchist and abolitionist, as well as my personal experience as a neurodivergent Black woman and second generation Ethiopian American.

Education & Training

I am not a trained or licensed clinician, and am therefore not qualified to provide psychotherapy or psychiatric services.

As an educator and practitioner, my work is informed by and integrated with extensive (non-certification) training in and study of the following modalities: Somatic Experiencing, Internal Family Systems, Dialectical Behavioral Therapy, and Polyvagal Theory.

I am a certified Ashtanga yoga instructor with additional certification in trauma-informed yoga. I am also certified in Mental Health First Aid. My eclectic spiritual practice is also informed by the work of Thich Nhat Hanh and my time at Blue Cliff Monastery. In 2015, I received a B.A. in Anthropology from Columbia University.

 

in the press

“The consequences of not talking about pleasure with young people are all of the things that we are most scared of happening to young people—abusive relationships, sexual violence, physical violence, all of these things are a part of what happens when you deny people information about themselves based on a political and moral and misogynistic agenda.”
— Sex Ed In Color, “Fighting a Sexual Apocalypse with Haylin Belay”
‘[Witchcraft] is a way of developing my self-knowledge and self-trust and obviously self-care,’ Belay said. ‘It doesn’t really matter to me — and this is why I say that my skepticism and my witchcraft can coexist — if it’s fake. The fakeness or realness of it isn’t the point.’

The point of practicing witchcraft is that it brings her joy.
— Religion Unplugged, “The Spiritual Journey of a Modern Witch”
Of course, even with witchcraft becoming increasingly common, there are still many who are skeptical of witchcraft. Belay’s take? ‘A lot of times, on dates, I’ll get questions from guys being like, “Oh, witchcraft– are you really into that? Is it ‘for real’?” The place I always go with that is: it really doesn’t matter if it’s real. It really does not matter if it’s literally, actually True with a capital T. [...] In my subjective experience of the world, witchcraft is useful, it’s helpful to me, and it actively contributes to my quality of life. I’ve long since given up any attachment to the idea of “real” or “true” or “authentic”‘
— Garden Collage, "Haylin Belay on Practicing Witchcraft in NYC"
After graduation, Haylin hopes to continue writing and educating people. She’s been applying to editorial positions at publications with a health beat; her dream job is ‘being paid to talk about sex.’ So she’s not worried about her sex column popping up in her search results—in fact, she says it’s a representation of her values. ‘As someone who’s experienced a lot of slut-shaming and negative attention about sex, I think at a certain point I hit a nadir and said, “Okay, I’m choosing not to let this affect me anymore.” As long as everyone’s being healthy and making smart choices and everything’s consensual, then sex should not be something that anyone’s ashamed of.’
— Blue & White Magazine, "Campus Character: Haylin Belay"

watch

Watch my web series: How to Sex Toy (Cosmopolitan)
Below are selected interviews and profiles.

Web Profile: Huffington Post,
“How Witchcraft Helped This Woman Heal from Trauma”
Web Profile: Ozy Magazine,
"Spells for the Modern Day Sorceress"
Web Interview: Cosmopolitan, “The Sex Ed Crisis” [“Virginity-Focused Sex Ed Shames Victims”]
TV Interview: Sex. Right. Now., "Ladies of Sex Tech" [trailer]
TV Panel Interview: The Daily Show, "Sexual Racism: When Preferences Become Discrimination"

listen

Listen to my podcasts: On Deck, Emotional Labor
Below are selected interviews and profiles.

Panel Discussion: 92nd St Y, "The Future of Sex: Cosmopolitan's Jessica Pels and Esquire's Michael Sebastian with Haylin Belay”
Profile: Witch Wave Pod
, “#74: Haylin Belay, Pleasure Witch”
Profile: Sex Ed In Color,
“Fighting a Sexual Apocalypse with Haylin Belay”
Profile: Real Talk Radio,
 "Haylin Belay on Sex Education, Modern Witchcraft, and Relationship Anarchy"
Profile: Juicy Bits, "Sexpert Haylin Belay"
Profile: Biology of the Blog, "Haylin Belay"
Profile: The Turn On, “Episode 10.5 | The Turn On x Haylin Belay”
Interview: Another Round, "Dearest Y'all, We Have Some News."
Interview: Flash Forward, "How Is Babby (Not) Made"
Interview: Radio Interview: Sex Ed with DB, "Meet Your Students Where They're At"
Interview: MetroFocus, "The Physical Effects of Racism" [Part 1] [Part 2]

read

Click here to read my writing (articles & essays).
Below are selected interviews and features.

Profile: Religion Unplugged
, “The Spiritual Journey of a Modern Witch
Profile: Garden Collage, "Haylin Belay on Practicing Witchcraft in NYC"
Two-Part Profile: AYO Magazine, "Health Educator Haylin Belay Wants You to Be Okay With Sex" & "Witchcraft As Black Feminist Practice: Part II With Educator Haylin Belay"
Profile: Blue & White Magazine, "Campus Character: Haylin Belay"

Quoted in...
iHeartRadio, "2018 Psychic Predictions: Taylor Swift, Kanye West, Britney Spears, & More"
WHEDCo.org, "JAM Empowers Middle and High School Students through Sex-Ed"
InStyle, "Sexual Consent: Why We Still Haven’t Gotten the Conversation Right"
Bustle,What is New Relationship Energy? 7 Ways to Make It Last
Flavorwire,Teaching Trigger Warnings: What Pundits Don’t Get
Podraland, “The Tuesday Pod: Sex Education, Witchcraft, and Healing

conferences

Sex Down South 2023 “Becoming a Trusted Adult”

SisterSong 2022 “Kinkcraft” ; “Creating Consent Culture”

Modern Witches Confluence 2021 “Pleasure Magic & the Shadow”

Golden Dome School 2020 “Abolitionist Witchcraft”

Sex Down South 2019 “Sex-Positive Yoga”; “How To Have Good Sex: Talking to Youth About Pleasure”

Woodhull Sexual Freedom Summit 2018 [Panel] "Beyond Consent: Power, Pleasure, Profit"

Black Girl Project Sisterhood Summit 2018 "The Sacrament of Yes: Creating a Positive Consent Culture"

[Keynote] Northwest Magic Conference 2018 "What Feels Right: Intuition & Pleasure In Magical Practice"
[Workshop] "Mind, Body, & Spirit: Bodywork for Healing Intuition"

Access Matters Leading the Way Conference 2018 [Panel] “Beyond the Yes Means Yes Consent Model”

Civil Liberties and Public Policy 2018 [Panel] "Power, Pleasure, Profit: Radical Visions of Consent"

National Sex Ed Conference 2017 "Creating, Maintaining, and Repairing Safe Spaces"

SisterSong 2017 [Plenary Panel] "Power, Pleasure, Profit: Radical Visions of Consent"

Columbia University Scholars Program Symposium 2014 "Alcohol use and risky sexual behavior among young adults living in Nantes, France"

BACCHUS Initiative General Assemblies 2012/2013/2014, Regional Assemblies 2013/2014, IvyAlcohol Symposium 2014 "Responsible Communities @ Columbia: Peer Education Models for Alcohol Education"

Private workshops, education consulting, and professional development for B’Well Counseling ; Creative Tools Therapy ; Avenues: The World School ; Dr. Drew ; Salem State University ; Denison University ; Modern Manhood ; NY Interschool ; The Doula Project ; Terrace Club at Princeton University ; SHAG (18+); Girls Inc of NYC ; Ali Forney Center ; Gwen Shockey Fine Art at Amos Eno Gallery ; and others.

 

“All people deserve an integrated sex life
and the healthy pursuit of pleasure.”

All people have a right to the information they need to make decisions about their health and pleasure, and to receive this information in spaces that are safe and accessible.

Our sex lives are not separate from our "real" lives, and finding our healthiest, most pleasurable sex lives is a crucial part of our overall self-discovery and self-actualization.  Whether someone wants lots of kinky sex or no sex at all, being able to clearly identify and safely pursue our desires is a fundamental part of living an integrated life that supports mental, emotional, physiological, spiritual, and social well-being.

Comprehensive sexuality education, and health promotion more broadly, has a responsibility to incorporate the healthy pursuit of sexual and non-sexual pleasure, especially in marginalized and/or trauma-impacted populations. Recovery from trauma requires specific and loving interventions for re-learning embodied relationships to pleasure, fear, joy, and pain.

I support people in living their healthiest and most pleasurable lives through the development and practice of the following frameworks and methodologies:

Somatic Self-Bodywork: Experiential lessons in embodiment, movement, and self-massage for the reduction of physical and emotional pain.

Social-Emotional Tarot: A secular and trauma-informed approach to safely using the Tarot as a tool for self-intimacy and self-discovery.

Whole-Self Witchcraft: Non-theistic spirituality-based trauma recovery tools from an eclectic, holistic, and secular perspective.

BD&DSM: Trauma-informed insights on consensual kink and tabletop roleplaying as complementary tools for psychosocial wellness.